Blog
A Two Thousand Year-Old Recipe for a Credible Faith
Introduction In Matthew 15:1–20, Jesus confronts the Pharisees over the ritual of handwashing, revealing a deeper conflict between external religiosity and inner moral transformation. The Pharisees’ concern for purity, while originating in reverence, had become...
Making an Apology and Amends
Apologies Must be Sincere We all hurt others at some point—often from an early age. Many of us learned the childhood ritual: a child hits another, an adult intervenes, and the offender is told, “Now tell her you’re sorry.” The words come out forced, sharp, and hollow:...
How a Spouse and Family Can Support a Recovering Alcoholic
Supporting Your Spouse Through Recovery: A Guide for Families Affected by Alcoholism When I work with alcoholics, I know that their problem affects a wide circle: spouses, children, friends, and co-workers. No one is more affected, wounded, and triggered by an...
A Wee Little Man Made a Big List–Step Eight
Zacchaeus, a tax collector, lived in Jericho a little over two thousand years ago. Zacchaeus collected taxes for the Romans. Whatever taxes Zacchaeus collected above what the Jewish people owed the Romans, he could keep for himself. The people had no choice but to...
Love Your Enemies
Many years ago, publisher Justice Rain faced an uncomfortable situation that every businessperson knows well—an angry customer demanding a refund he believed was unjustified. The customer was rude and arrogant, stirring up Justice's anger and destroying any...
Good Communication Creates Intimacy
💃 What Kind of Dance Are You Doing with Your Partner? After nearly 200 marital and pre-marital counseling sessions, I’ve noticed a few common problems that plague relationships. One of the biggest? How couples communicate — or don’t communicate. 💬 When Love Exists but...
Humiliation, Humility, and the Seventh Step
A Humbling Experience To become a Board Certified Chaplain, a person must have a college degree, a seminary degree, and four units of Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE). This represents a full year of supervised training, usually in a hospital setting. In addition,...
Step Six: Entirely Ready to Have God Remove All These Defects of Character
Character in Story and Scripture In To Kill a Mockingbird, Atticus Finch embodies strong moral character. He lives with integrity, practices courage in defending Tom Robinson despite community backlash, treats opponents with respect, and upholds fairness and justice....
The Hardest Words to Say: Step 5 to Sobriety
There are three words that change everything. They’re not “I love you.” They’re not “I forgive you.” They’re these: “I was wrong.” Why are they so hard to say? Because our pride resists them. Our brains scramble to defend us, to prove we were right, to protect our...
Step Four: “Made a Searching and Fearless Moral Inventory of Ourselves”
The Medical Reality of Alcohol Use Disorder As a chaplain, I frequently visit patients who struggle with Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD). The medical field now recognizes AUD as a chronic, relapsing brain disease that alters brain structure and function—particularly in...
Step Three to Sobriety: Surrendering Self-Will and Finding Spiritual Freedom
“Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” – A.A. In The Gifts of Imperfection, Brené Brown writes that our first response to pain is often self-protection. We shield ourselves by blaming others, turning to judgment,...
Step Two to Sobriety
“Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” As a pastoral counselor, people often come to me for help in overcoming their addiction because I bring both theological training and psychological education to the table. What...